Monday, Jun 5 - 03:39 PM
As far as the utopia of putting the past in the past, my son said to me one day that I am always such an eternal optimist that I actually think things will completely change for the good forever.
Life in its reality is not that way. It’s like I think you can get to a place in consciousness where some things will no longer happen. Well, things keep cropping up and I am beginning to see some reality here that many things do not and will not change.
Instead of looking forward to the changes or looking back on things from the past I didn’t like, I can just stay in the moment. It is a much better place to be because you are in a place of joy and reality right now. It’s about focusing on the now and enjoying it.
So often the past is not ideal and yet it can be from time to time and the future is not something to worry about. It is important to just stay present to the moment. I don’t know how many times I have said that, but I know it is time to remember it for the sake of living life full out.
Twenty-six years is a long time to keep doing some things that keep cropping up the same way. I know it has been said that insanity is wishing things were different but continuing to do the same things. When I continue to do the same things, it is only logical that those same habits will create the same results.
Tuesday, Jun 6 - 09:30 PM
I am really taking a serious look at what I want changed and making some necessary changes to change it. I’ll see how I do. I have the faith. I think things can change, but whatever doesn’t is ok because I look at it now as a process with lessons to be learned instead of wishing for the ideal.
The old saying, “Some things never change.” What can change is my attitude toward those things--an interesting thing to remember. So remember it will ya, Sandy!
Wednesday, Jun 7 - 12:55 PM
It has been a real interesting couple days. I didn’t want to go to a love skills communication session, but I went anyway and it was absolutely fascinating. I thought about not going to the luncheon at church for volunteers and leaders, but I went anyway. I was late because I was missing one ingredient in the darn potato dish, but it didn’t matter to me being late like it usually would.
I couldn’t get into the sanctuary because they were already into the meditation and the doors are closed for that so I went up in the balcony and listened to the meditation standing up and then when the doors were opened up again, I went over to a couch that was real comfy because I really didn’t want to walk in downstairs about 35 minutes late by now. It really didn’t bother me that I was so late.
So, I laid down on the couch, closed my eyes, got real comfortable and just listened to the message. It was all about self-esteem. I learned from Barksdale and Bill McGrane that sound self-esteem is about feeling good about myself. Well, I had done everything wrong this morning, but in spite of that, I felt good about myself.
After the service, I was standing out in the hallway minding my own business when Mary, a long time friend, tapped me on the shoulder walking by and said hi. She went into the bookstore on a mission and I followed a few minutes later. Well, we connected and I asked her what she was up to. We really connected on a great idea relating to education that her new materials could help kids across America and I knew just the person to connect her with. After we quit talking, she wondered around and took 2 books off the shelf to show me and as I was buying the tape of the morning service that I had missed some of, I took them from her and bought them on the spot and she signed them with special heart-felt messages written personally for me.
Later, she introduced me to someone else who was a great lady looking for mentors to young woman leaders in the community and I said yes. Well, this has been an incredible 2 days with me not getting done what I thought I wanted to get done, with me messing things up being late etc. and yet, because I just gave in to all those events as they fell on my path, many wonderful connections living miracles came out of them.
Friday, Jun 9 - 06:35 AM
I see how finally giving in to things, letting things happen, as they will instead of being so darn structured brought more bliss and magnificence to my life. So, I thought and wondered what would happen if I stopped making judgment of my clutter, my weight, my boxes, my letting go of the past or not letting go of the past or worrying about the future or not worrying about the future---what kind of magnificence can come from going with all of that.
I learned this week end that getting out of my own way was one of the biggest steps I could take for me to get on with life in a more incredible way. I love the learning. I love the experiences. I love simplicity. I love letting it be “not to matter things”.
I have always wanted freedom and had a certain perception of what that meant. Well, maybe I just found another wonderful way to experience it. Yeah, I do think so. Thank you, Spirit, for showing me the way to help me get out of my own way.
Miracles in Motion---that’s what it is-----that’s what it is. And isn’t that just wonderful! And as a friend of mine and I so often say, “That’s Just Ducky! And we like Ducky!”
Saturday, Jun 10 - 09:14 PM
This is a rather mixed up rather disoriented kind of week. I found myself mentally pulled from all kinds of different directions---many old prompters were taking over my life instead of me taking over them.
Somehow, I feel now that it all served a purpose being that I have to be the center of my own universe. In doing so, I will be listening to my Inner Knower; I will continue to find the right track and stay on the track that my higher self has designed for me. Two people told me to do whatever comes naturally, to do what I feel—I’m in charge.
I feel it is my obligation and destiny to “Listen” carefully now to go where I am to go and do what I am destined to do. There is a definiteness nudging in my consciousness to take seriously what my life’s work is and become focused, dedicated, and disciplined regarding it. It is in the personal development industry. I know I have talent here above the ordinary and am to use it for my sake and the sake of many other people.
I know I will be helping people in a unique way as years go by. I am grateful for the people who are coming into my life to be a part of all this. I feel like I am blessed.
Return To Diary Menu
|
